We have three days to pack what we want to take with us into the new year......and decide what to leave behind. Maybe that's the best part of a new year.....the parting with the baggage that only weighs us down.
I'm not talking about the material, but the emotional baggage. It's not possible for any one of us to make it through our life journey without negative experiences that impact our mental well-being. There are trust issues, fears, guilt, shame, grief, despair, regret and other psychological traumas. It's the perfect time to let go of our past disappointments and pain.
So much easier said than done. My plan is this: when a negative memory enters my head, instead of dwelling on it, I'm going to stop and immediately think of something that makes me happy. This is so possible, yet seems impossible. It's at least worth a try. They say new habits become ingrained in our daily routines, reducing the weight of the past.
My life journey has experienced tragedy in multiple forms, resulting in what I call cancer of the heart. There were times following one of these tragedies, that I didn't think I could make it to the next hour, let alone the next day. Self-help books and keeping a personal handwritten journal were my two therapists, and they carried me forward to where I am today. And, blogging is a form of self-preservation and self-fulfillment for me. It's ironic how the ideal venue opens for us at the right time.
Negative thoughts may be invisible, but they weigh a ton. Every horrible memory takes us back to the moment. Some memories I've relived over and over so many times, and it did me not one ounce of good. All those memories have done is take up space in my brain. Now is the time for me to begin my "magic slate" method of erasing a painful experience the minute it pushes its way to the front of the line. Maybe instead of that memory I'll replace it with the memory of me throwing a coin over my shoulder in the Trevi Fountain or walking beside my daddy checking the fences on the farm, or the time four of us friends spent Christmas Eve up at our cabin in the woods. One thing for sure, I have a ton more happy things to think about than bad.
Instead of resolving to add penalty or punishment to 2025, I'm packing a smaller suitcase. My mantra shall be......If it hurts, let it go. This approach will make use of my brain's cut-and-paste option.
Another option might be undertaking a project that requires concentration. When the past wrestles with us, maybe we can shelter ourselves in creativity. Coping skills are out there, we just have to find 'em.
Failure is part of the self-rescue. At the outset, expect to get lost along the way, so pack a walking stick and compass. Think higher and kinder.
2025 finds us living in a violent, untrustworthy era. We need to create for ourselves a safe brain space. Somewhere we can go to escape the negative pummeling the media uses to sway our thinking. The media feasts on distorting the news and zooming in on corrupt stories that excite and anger their audience. Some are more prone to believing everything they hear, not realizing that bias is a weapon. We've gotta be smart enough to know the media is always seeking the best ratings. The worse they can make things sound, the higher their ratings.
Acceptance is something else that I've taught myself. Probably the worst pain was the pain of losing ones we loved. Part of life is meeting new people while letting go of others. It's sort of like a rotation. After a while, one simply has to accept whatever fate serves us. The older we get, the more we fear the future. The mind is very skilled at creating vivid scenarios that most likely will never happen. Yet, we live those scenarios as if they're real. Maybe it's a kind of preparation. We feel our limitations setting in. The burdens of life are heavy and will inevitably get heavier. If there's a way to ease the weight of worry, then it's worth a try.
Each of us is responsible for our one and only self. Instead of stepping out of our comfort zone, wny not create a comfort zone for my brain for those times when it starts acting like a hamster wheel. A place where my mind can feel at peace. When we push discomfort aside and embrace comfort, we practice self-compassion. And, that's the aim in 2025.
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